She is gone

7-31-06

I don't even know how to say this b/c I've never had to deal with it before but I could desperately use your prayers. My mother in law is dying. We have hospice in the house now and we've been up all night with her. There is nothing left to be done. She is on morphine now to keep her comfortable and we have all said our goodbyes and given our permission for her to let go. Please say a prayer that she is able to pass on soon girls. I know I haven't updated on my MIL or my Mom in a while but that is b/e it's like one thing after the other and nothing but bad news. So I'm sure hearing that my MIL is literally on her death bed is a shock and I'm sorry for that. I know how many friends I have on this board and I am grateful for every last one of you. I will be using your strength until the time comes.

Update - 433pm My MIL has passed on. She is with God now. Thank you all so much for your prayers and well wishes. I'll talk to you soon.

Update 5-10-06

Hi everyone,

Some ppl have asked so I thought I'd give an update on my MIL. I'm sorry I haven't before now, there just has been nothing good to report and I didn't want to bring everyone down.

She went into Boston yesterday to see the specialist for her specific type of cancer. He told her flat out that she is not a candidate for surgery but that they could start Chemotherapy on her. Even with the Chemo there is no chance of remission. This cancer is too agressive. The chemo *might* alleviate some of her symptoms but that is all it will do. He also told her that the cancer has already spread. There is a new spot in the pericardial area and a spot on her liver as well. I believe there are a few other new spots but I can't keep them all straight.

He wanted her to go to the ER last night b/c her pulsox level was only 88%. She said she would but then decided she wanted to go home rather than spend the night waiting in the ER.
They went to the ER this morning instead and they have ended up readmitting her. They think she has pneumonia in her left lung and they believe the fluid from her cancer has come back in a different area. They will be running tests on her tomorrow to see where she is at. If the fluid is back they will redrain it.

The way the Dr's are talking we honestly don't know if she will make it to Christmas. She has already picked out two funeral homes she wants to go and look at and make all the necessary arrangements. She is being very realistic about all of this which is amazing but she is still able to keep her spirits up as well. She is an amazing woman. Pls continue to pray for her.

Oncologist visit 4-19-06

Hi everyone,

First, I just have to say again thank you all SO much for being here through all of this. You have no idea how much I really appreciate it. Now for the news.

MIL definitely has cancer. It is called Mesothelioma and it is caused by exposure to Asbestos. That is the ONLY known cause of this cancer. Her father and my FIL both worked with Asbestos and that is how she became exposed. This cancer has an incubation period of 30-40yrs and occurs in ppl most often between the ages of 50-70. MIL is 57.

We asked the Dr what her options were and he said the first thing right now is waiting for her to heal from her thyroid surgery. However, while she is healing, she can set up an appt with a specialist in Boston that deals specifically with this cancer. They are calling him today. We asked if removing the tumor, half the lung or even the whole lung was an option. He said it is an option in most ppl but he wasn't very optimistic about my MIL b/c of her medical history. She had a stroke last year, has diabetes and is extremely overweight. He wasn't confident at ALL about surgery. She can do Chemo and see where that takes her and she can start that as soon as she is healed from her surgery which is great news. At least we don't have to sit and wait around. He also said that without ANY treatment at all he'd say her life expectancy is 12 - 18mon which is still too short but a hell of a lot better than 2-3 months!! We'll take it.

MIL is VERY strong willed and intends on fighting this 100%. We need to get my FIL and SIL on board b/c they are being ridiculously pessimistic and she needs everyone to be positive.

Please continue to say prayers for my MIL - I know she is going to need them b/c the treatment is going to be tough.

Cancer.

4-13-06

My MIL had her surgery yesterday and we got some really bad news.

She has cancer. The tumor in her lung has doubled in size since last week. All of the fluid they drained last Friday is back and then some. They tested the fluid again yesterday and it IS malignant. She has two Dr's on her case right now and they conferred and have given her 3 mon to live. They don't think chemo or radiation is going to help at all.

She is meeting with an Oncologist this morning and we'll see what she has to say. She is the #1 oncologist in the area from what I am told. We are praying as hard as we can that she has a better prognosis.

As soon as DH hears from his sister he is going to call me w/the oncologist's report.

Please keep her in your prayers. I am devastated right now. I know I complain about my MIL but I honestly do love her and I am not ready for her to leave. I'm not even sure what else to say.

Cancer?

4-6-06

DH just called me:

Me: Hey, what's up? (we have caller ID)
DH: Not much, Ma might have cancer.

NICE DELIVERY JACKOFF!

Un freaking believeable. What the heck is going to happen next?? She is going to have surgery on Wed to remove her thyroid b/c there is something wrong with it. She is having a biopsy on her lungs and on Tuesday they are injecting her with some kind of nuclear medicine and if her lungs absorb it that means she has cancer.

I. Can't. Take. Anymore.

In hosp 4-4-06

MIL was admitted to the hospital tonight. She has been feeling badly for about 2 wks now. Has a hard time breathing, walking from room to room.

They found fluid in her lungs that is going to need to be drained out BUT she is on Cumidin (a blood thinner) b/c she is prone to clots and they can't do the procedure until the Cumidin is gone from her system. We were told that would take 3 days. They have her hooked up to Oxygen and she'll have to stay on it as even with it attached to her her pulsox (is that right you medical girls??) is only at a 92%.

She told my SIL that she doesn't think she'll live another 2yrs. SIL said tonight that she is scared she isn't going to make it through this b/c things are pretty bad right now.

As much as I bitch about my MIL I really do love her - she is just a hard personality to get used to. Please pray for her.

One more request if I may - my sister. I know I didn't elaborate last week but she got herself into some trouble re: some things she did two yrs ago. I just found out tonight that SHE is being admitted to the hosp next Thurs b/c she needs surgery. If you could pls say a prayer for her as well. She is really upset and scared about this surgery and really wants me to be with her but obviously I can't fly at 34wks pg.

Thanks girls.

Update 6-13-05

It's been a long and horrible weekend girls.

First off - my MIL had a stroke. She has been in the hospital since 7am on Saturday morning. She has been diagnosed as an insulin dependant diabetic with high cholesterol and high blood pressure. Her undiagnosed Diabetes combined with her blood sugar level was what caused her stroke. It affected the left side of her body. She had another stroke while in the hospital yesterday morning. She's not doing so hot. Her left arm is still losing strength - not getting better. Her left foot involuntarily moves itself. When she talks she sounds like she is drunk. Right now the Dr says it looks like she is going to be in the hospital for like a month and then she'll go to Braintree Rehab (a local rehab center that she will live at). Dr's are also saying she is also going to have to retire. She is 55yrs old.

As if that wasn't enough I was at the hospital until 11pm last night with MY mother. We brought her to the emergency room. She has been diagnosed with Cellulitus. She has had it for a month (she says) and Dr says is lucky she didn't die. My brother went over there yesterday to bring her some soda b/c she was all out. Well he comes home and says he saw my Mom's leg (her GOOD leg at that - my Mom had to have her right leg amputated below the knee 2yrs ago) and it is all red, blistering and (sorry TMI) oozing. I was like WTF? So I went over and looked and it is disgusting. She has open sores all over the back of her leg that just have crap running out of it. I had to force her to go to the damn hospital. We get there and the nurse tells her she should have come in at least 5 days ago. Nice. So they bring her back to Urgent care and tell her she is going to have blood work, an IV and have her leg dressed. We were there for 6 hours. I hate the ER. She got her IV about 10:30pm. She had to go back in this am at 8am to get another dose of IV antibiotics and they had to do an Ultrasound on her leg to make sure there are no clots or anything. My brother took her in and we are waiting now for her to call so we can go pick her up when she is done.

If you made it this far, thank you for reading. I would very much appreciate your prayers right now.

(((HUGS)))