I couldn't make this up if I tried

I've been trying to keep track of the random funny things that my kids say.
I find myself whipping my phone out to type it into my "notes" app so I don't forget because, honestly, some of this cracks me UP!   It might just be because they are my kids.  I am hearing them say it.  I hear the tone, the way, etc.  I know them.   You may not find it as funny as I do.  But I'm blogging anyway because I'm sure, one day, I'll look back on these and find them even more funny than I do now.

Sunday we're on a road trip.
I had asked John two months ago to fix my roof racks because they make a REALLY loud whistling noise when you're driving on the highway.  Super annoying - I can't stand it.
Erynn says Mom, what is that NOISE???
I said It's the roof racks.
She says It's really annoying and LOUD!
I said Yeah, it kind of is, isn't it??  (all the while looking pointedly at John who is just smirking out the side of his face)
Aidan says It sounds like pigeons Mom!
Erynn says YEAH!  It sounds just like MIDGETS!!!!!
WTH???

Ryan comes into the living room.
Guess what I'm going to be when I grow up Mom!
What are you going to be when you grow up Ryan?
I'm going to be a rock star singer.  Because I have an awesome voice!  And you can come.  Anytime you want.  Just give me a call at my house.  It will start at ten o'clock.
Okay buddy, I'll be there.  LOL.

Ryan says Mom?  Is breeze a different word for wind?
Yes Ryan.
Oh.  Well, that sure is some good breezin' going on out there.

The other night I was watching Big Ang.  I know, I know, but there was nothing on TV or on my DVR.
Her friend took her to a consignment shop to get rid of some of her clothes and things because she had WAY too much crap in her house.   Erynn came down and was watching that segment with me.
Erynn says She is definitely NOT a nice girl!!  (referring to Ang's friend)
I said Why not?
Because she won't let her friend buy any of those clothes!!  (Ang was looking at other items in the shop that she wanted to buy and her friend said no, you came here to get rid of stuff, not buy MORE!)

I swear - the things that comes out of these kids mouths is just priceless.  I love every minute of it!