On edge

What do you do when you are so pissy you can't stand yourself??

I really don't know what is wrong with me but I'm in a total funk lately. People's comments are rubbing me the wrong way....I'm extra emotional....I can't deal with other people's drama and want to be left out of it......I just don't understand why I am so on edge.

I can't stand he said / she said bullshit. I really can't. I try to stay away from any / all drama. Today I was asked why I said something to someone. Of course the situation didn't play out anywhere near what that person was told and I am pissy that I was called into question. After text messages back and forth, I picked up the phone and had a conversation. I can't be texting back and forth all day, I'm at work. It all worked out, as far as I know, and we're good but it just bothers me that it came up in the first place. Aren't we all adults? Why do people have to created drama when there isn't any? If you think I said something, ask me. Or if someone told you I said something, ask me. Don't beat around the bush. I don't know if I'm getting / got all worked up because of my mood or because this person is a good friend and should know that the way the situation was explained to her doesn't sound ANYTHING like the way I behave. To be fair, she did say she thought it was very strange and didn't sound like me at all but I just don't like being put in that position. I don't like it when people (that I don't even know mind you!) put words in my mouth.

If I do something, call me on it. If I say something, call me on it. Even more - call me on it THEN. In that moment. Don't wait days/weeks/years whatever. Truth be told I can barely remember last night. I'm not going to remember a random comment I said in passing 3,4,10,12 weeks/months/years ago.

I am who I am. I am a very honest person. If you have a question, I'll answer it. I won't tell you what you want to hear - that's not me. I'll tell you MY opinion / view but, keep in mind 1) you asked and 2) it's only MY opinion. Which, at the end of the day, doesn't mean shit to anyone but me. If you are in my life and know me at all you already know this. You won't ask me anything you don't want to hear an honest answer about and you are okay with it which is why you asked me in the first place. I'm just putting it out there in cyberspace.

All of the above isn't just referrring to today. It just so happens that I apparantly needed to get that out in general. Must be part of my pissiness. I think I'd better steer clear of people for the foreseeable future.

I need a hug.