RASH

2-18-06 It's back.

The TERRIBLE rash I had when pg with Aidan is back. I woke up this morning and it's all over. This is what happened with Aidan and they tested me for PUPPS. I was known as "the pupps girl" in the hosp. Girls, I have NO idea what to do. I am literally trying so hard not to claw my skin off my body. It's everywhere. My arms, my legs, my stomach. I don't remember it being this early last time - I'm 27wks today. I am going to see my midwife on Wed for my G.D. test and my Rhogham shot and I hope to make it through til then to talk to her about it. I already bought the anti itch lotion - everything that I used with Aidan. But, like with him, it just isn't working. I might call on Monday and see if they are open - I am off for the holiday. Agnes is the midwife who ran my blood work last time so I'm sure she will remember my going through this then, hopefully she is working. I have no clue how I am going to make it through the next 13wks with this. I'm sorry to be so whiny and childlike here. I was just hoping so much to not have to deal with it this time. I'm hoping it doesn't get as bad as it did with Aidan. I had huge welts all over me - it looked like a bad sunburn with blisters but there was no liquid in the blisters. Here is just part of my arm - it looks like I have little bites all over me.

Update 1-31-06

Not sure if I updated since last week but last Wed she had a grand mal seizure that lasted 30min and then Thurs she had a series of seizures that caused her to lose 12hrs of time. She couldn't remember who she was, where she was - nothing. These were both Epileptic seizures. Her Dr told her he wanted her readmitted to the hosp but she was really against it and made a deal with him - if she had ONE more like that she would go back in.

FF to last night.

I was in the kitchen making dinner so I never heard my cell phone ring. My brother had his roommate call my DH's cell to get to me. My brother was on the phone with my sister. She had just had another epileptic seizure and was panicking. She had no idea where she was, who was with her etc. I ran to get my cell phone and saw I had 4 missed calls. They had been trying to reach me and when I checked my vm it was Cheryl's gf's older sister crying on my vm. I felt terrible.

My brother said I had to call Cheryl b/c he was trying as hard as he could and he couldn't "talk her down" to normal. I said to tell her I was going to beep in. Cheryl answered my beep and I was able to get her to calm down enough to talk to me. I asked her if she knew where she was. She said NO. I said do you know who is with you? She said NO. So I'm trying to figure out who the hell might be there with her. I say is there a blond girl in the room? (Cynthia, her gf) She says no. (she was still at work) I say is there a lady with glasses? (Cynthia's Mom) She says Yes. I say is there another lady with brown hair? (Cynthia's sister) She says yes. I say okay and you don't know them? She says no and starts to cry again. I say don't worry honey, it will be okay, I promise. She says Christine WHY can't I remember??? I said this is normal - your brain just went through a really hard thing right now and it just needs a minute to catch up. I asked if she remembers having a seizure, she says yes. I say do you know who those ppl are? (I always go back to the same questions until she "gets it right" but I NEVER tell her who anyone is - she always remembers on her own but it just takes a few min of talking her down) She says no. I say can you put the lady with the brown hair on the phone for me? She puts Melissa on, who is still crying at this point, and I tell Melissa that it's okay and that Cheryl is going to be just fine. I ask her if she can do me a favor and go to Cynthia and Cheryl's room and get a picture of Cynthia and Cheryl together. She does and she gives it to my sister and puts her back on the phone. I ask her if she knows who she is looking at. She says no. I say but you know you should know her right? She says yes. I say it's okay, just take a minute and you will be okay. I tell her I have never had to tell her anything that she always gets there on her own - that is the truth. She says how long will it take? I say sometimes it takes 5min, sometimes 20min but it's okay. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere until we work it out. I ask again, do you know who that is? She is quiet for a few minutes but then says it's Cynthia. I say that's right. Then I say and who is the lady with you that has glasses. She says Mary. I said yes and what about the other one with the brown hair. She says Melissa. I said yes honey, that's right. I said is Melissa still crying? She said yes. I said why don't you let her know you are okay. So Cheryl says it's okay Melissa - I know who you are - I am okay now.

I told her that she knew what this meant. She said yes, that she'll have to go back in the hosp but she didn't want to. I said Cheryl, this is actually a GOOD thing. She lost her job right before Christmas so she has NO medical insurance and no income at all and cannot afford her seizure medication. (she had been going on job interviews and second interviews right before all of this happened) She would have taken her last dose of Keppra (one of the seizure meds) last night and then would have run out. I said her going back in the hosp was good for two things - they can monitor her seizures again and rework the dosages and she will also get her medication and not have to worry about how she was going to pay for it. She said she didn't want to go back b/c I wasn't going to be there this time. I said I know but I can't help it. I told her she could still reach me by phone no matter what time whenever she needed to talk to me. Her gf got home from work at this point and I asked Cheryl to put Cynthia on the phone. I explained everything that had happened and I said pls make sure she calls her Dr b/c he needs to know. She is going to have to be readmitted. My sister promised she would call and she called him last night. When I talked to her he hadn't called back yet but he was off for the day so I told her it might take a little while.

I am still so upset. I can't imagine being in her shoes - waking up and not even knowing where you live or who you are with. I just thank God that she comes out of it every time and I pray that there is never any permanant loss.

Thank you for reading if you got this far - I know it's a lot! Please send prayers for my sister and if you can spare any strength for me I'd appreciate it